the extreme sisyphus challenge

Fact: LittleBigPlanet is one of my favorite games of all time. I still occasionally turn it on and attempt to carve an exemplary level out of the tools Media Molecule provided. Most of the time, I give up half-way. Sadly, that wasn’t the case for “The Extreme Sisyphus Challenge,” which I posted a brief runthrough of above.

It’s pretty unpolished — though, it doesn’t help that it was filmed using my shitty, non-HD Flip Video (yes, I still don’t have any professional video capturing equipment). As you might imagine, it was a bear to test out. Even now, I can only “beat” it one or two times before parts of my brain start to shut down. If anyone can top the current high score, they’re a hero. And possibly a vegetable.

Also, do you dig that quazi-subliminal branding at the end? I know you do.

grant andrews – kid cop (part three)

I live in fear of working on this blog; mostly because of the time it takes to transcribe my elementary school writing. My hands instinctively correct the little mistakes which are included in the original text (the first two-thirds of which can be found here and here), but I find their preservation important. My poor spelling and grammar was as much a part of my life as was my proclivity for … well, skateboarding? Apparently? More on that later. For now: Continue reading

grant andrews – kid cop (part two)

Aww shit, you guys thought it would never come. That’s just how I operate, though. I don’t just lower your expectations — I eradicate them, so when I come through, you’re more than just surprised, you’re changed. I’m like your drunk, deadbeat dad who disappeared for seven years, and then oh who’s that in the back row of your piano recital? Boom.

Make sure you don’t miss the exciting first installment. You’ve really gotta follow the story sequentially, or else your just gonna get all confuzzled. Grant Andrews is a lot like Lost, if Lost were written by an impossibly stupid fourth grader. Continue reading

grant andrews – kid cop (part one)

grantandrews1

My recent days have been spent excavating the ancestral home as I prepare to shuffle off to Cincinnati (next Saturday, which is soon). This is of little to no relevance to you, I’m sure, except for this one small treasure I dug up whilst pilfering the ancestral computer desk.

It’s a piece of literature I crafted in third or fourth grade. Hardback, of course — this is a classy piece of literature, and it’s meant for classy people. On the cover, a crudely drawn picture of a police badge — Atlanta Georgia Police Department, to be precise. Tucked behind the badge is a gun, I think. It’s the worst drawn gun in the history of gun photos, hence my confusion. Written above this illustration, in large, colorful block lettering:

GRANT ANDREWS – KID COP. Continue reading